My Addiction

The Time Spent

I used to think that I didn't have a problem and my mother, father, sister, nor brother could tell me otherwise, because I seen alcohol/drugs as a pain suppressant. I needed those things to get me through life. There where at least 10 years in the past where I could probably list the amount of times I spent more than 24 hours sober on one hand. It started out as fun and games, but I finally got my heart broke and felt comfort in the alcohol and drugs because I could not feel the pain as bad under the influence of one or the other. This is just the beginning.... so stay tuned for more of me and others.

The Lost Love

I had a relationship at one point where I did her wrong by hiding my addiction and causing problems between us for the fact that she was getting in the way of my addiction, so it was easier to cause problems and create distance between us in order for me to continue my addiction without fulling losing her, but in doing so I lost her and didn't seem to care at that time, it just meant more time to spend with my addiction. I did not know it then, but I see now that I caused that and not my addiction. I watched from the inside as my addiction took over my mind and made my life something that I didn't want, something that grew my hatred for people as well as myself to an all time high. I finally turned to my family for help and began my journey as a workaholic, consuming my time with work and drowning out my need for drugs/alcohol through that as well as suppressing my emotions, so I did not have to face the life I tore apart and the emotions that came with it.